Have you ever caught a glimpse of yourself in a store window or a mirror when you weren't expecting it? You know, before you've had a chance to suck in your stomach, raise your eyebrows oh-so-slightly, and point your boobs northward? Happened to me today, and I almost stumbled into heavy traffic in shock. I'll spare you the gory details, but let's just say it wasn't pretty. It wasn't at ALL pretty. It's time to tackle the wardrobe, people.
Today, I braved my chest of drawers which houses, among other things, my un-ironic tee shirt collection (for making fun of the hipsters in Williamsburg), sweat pants for extravagant lounging, and assorted tanks that had long since "crossed over". I filled three paper grocery bags with enough frump-wear to clothe new mamas all over the tri-state area! Among the gems I unearthed was a pair of sweats with writting on the butt (classy), an off-the-shoulder sweatshirt from the Flashdance era, and assorted religious "witness wear" - guaranteed to spark some lively conversations with bored atheists I meet on the train. I'll be so sorry to miss out on that fun because.... IT'S ALL GETTING FREECYCLED!
So, what did I learn today? Workout wear is for exercise only, and should not be mistaken for fashion - no matter what's written across the butt.
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