Day 46 - Fabulous Weekly Wrap-Up!

Happy Halloween everyone! Hope your little goblins scored a ton of candy (for you to snack on when they're not looking). So, this week I:

- meditated on the frantic side of busy
- tackled the monumental task of organizing my fabric stash - 16 boxes worth! I barely survived
- enjoyed Halloween with my little monkey and ate every piece of his candy (oh hush, he's only 13 months old - he can't have candy)

Next week, I'm tackling the coat closet, Things with Cords, and my junk drawer - yee hah. This evening, I'll leave you with a Halloween tale from my childhood. When we were young, my mom would send us trick-or-treating with a group of the neighborhood kids. We would make the rounds, trying to hit every single house with the porch lights on, and making sure to visit the Cramers twice (they always gave full sized Hershey bars). Our neighborhood of Pine Lakes was aptly named, lined with huge pine trees, acres of shrubs, and fabulous twists and turns. Each year, my mother would dress in some bloody, gory costume and hide in a ditch until we'd walk by; then, she'd jump out and scare us to the point of wetting our pants. It was so awesome! One year, we took a bit of a detour, and she hid in a damp ditch for almost two hours waiting for us - that's commitment! Even better? When someone pulled over because they thought she'd been hit by a car; she had to explain to them that no, she was just lying in a ditch to terrorize her children. Here's to childhood, and getting scared silly by the ones who love you the most!

Day 45 - Halloweenie

It's days like these I when really love being a mom. Today, I forgot about the stinky poop slings, the midnight operas, and the fact that my son's favorite thing to eat is paper. Today, I rediscovered Halloween through the eyes of my monkey, and I'm betting that it gets better every year.

Please don't ask what I'm wearing. Just. Don't. Ask. Focus instead on the adorable monkey I'm holding! I wore him in the carrier all over the park, so he was literally "the monkey on my back". It made me think about the traditions I want Sebastian to experience - spending the whole month planning the Best Costume Ever, carving the goofiest jack-o-lantern, sneaking candy one piece at time until you puke, you know - the fun stuff. It's nice to have a bit of space in my life to catch these little moments before they're gone and he's a teenager who would rather have his knuckles broken than give me a hug in public. So, I downloaded "Monster Mash", stuffed him into a monkey costume, and turned him loose in a pumpkin patch. I let him eat part of a spiced scone (he LOVED that), and then I spent a good part of the day nom-noming his chubby cheeks as he cackled and tried to stick his finger up my nose. And that was just the day before Halloween! I'm not sure what we'll do tomorrow, but I do know what we're wearing.

Day 44 - Don't Touch My Stash, Dude!

I'm back I'm back I'm back! The hubby was home for a whole 10 days, so we spent them doing Family Things and Catching Up (...brown chicken brown cow...) and not blogging. Priorities, people! ANYWAY. The time has come for me to face facts: I have a teensy weensy little problem. It started small, just a yard here or there, an innocent order at fabric.com, a quick trip to Mood. "I can stop anytime I want", I told myself, but here we are friends: I am suffering from a fabric addiction. You heard me. I'm being buried under an avalanche of yardage, and I absolutely cannot stop myself! Faux, leather? Gotta have it! Organic cotton knits? Outta my way! Sparkly holographic spandex on sale? Try to stop me! Oh, the pathos...

Now, I know I'm not alone. Fess up, sewing mamas! I know all about your stash - hiding in the closet, stuffed behind the sewing machine, overflowing the bins in the garage! Aaaaaaall that fabric, with or without a designated project in its future. Well, the time has come for this mama to pare down a bit... but just a bit. There's no way in H-E-double-hockey-sticks that I'm parting with my yardage, but I think I can safely get rid of the tiny scraps that wouldn't even clothe a matchstick. However, this calls for a compromise: while I'm not getting rid of a lot, I'm imposing a moratorium on any new fabric until I've used up a good amount of what I have (of course, the first person to remind me of this when I sneak home from the fabric district is likely to get a knuckle sandwich). I'm also putting it all into proper bins since I've got it scattered from here to Kingdom come. Ugh, I can feel the withdrawal starting even now... must... not... click... "confirm order"....

Day 43 - That'll Be $4367

So. We have reached the Time of Childproofing. This is so much fun, and all the gates add such a cozy, minimum-security prison look to my home! Sigh. If you are the parent of a small child, you've no doubt noticed the thousands and thousands of dollars worth of stuff you can buy to protect your child from everything from electrical shocks to poison. As we navigate this maze of measures, my question is: how much of this is really necessary and how much will just separate me from my hard-earned money and make me crazy?

A friend recently reminded me that even the best childproofing may just buy you time, and nothing replaces good supervision (moms - you know what I'm talking about - how your ears perk up when it's a little too quiet and you just KNOW that your child is eating chapstick?). She suggested a three-tiered approach to childproofing:
Level 1 - stuff that can kill them (poison, stairs, gas stove, etc.), the non-negotiables
Level 2 - stuff that could be very unpleasant (pulling things off tables, falls, etc.)
Level 3 - stuff that makes life more convenient for you (gating them into a particular room, etc.)

This approach makes a lot of sense to me. Short of wrapping them in bubble wrap and duct tape, we cannot prevent every accident, but we may be able to sidestep a lot of them. Over the next few weeks, I'll be trying to take a creative approach to keeping the young un from killing himself before I threaten to do it when he's 13. For starters, he loves to run around the coffee table, and managed to skin his nose on it last week - we both cried. Afterwards, I rimmed it with UGLY UGLY UGLY protective bump guards since it's only a matter of tiem before he gets up close and personal with it again. Then, I covered it with a really pretty jacquard cover I whipped up on my sewing machine. I also made a cover for the filing cabinet that he is determined to amputate his fingers in. I'll post pics this weekend, but you see where I'm going with this. Do you have any childproofing tricks that might save money and aren't hideous? Let's hear 'em!

Day 42 - Rushing Around Like a Demented Bumble Bee

Being as I'm all a-tired from pulling together this behemoth of a corporate show, I don't have the oomph to do much except make the following observation. Let's catalogue it under "Science of the Obvious". There are only so many hours/minutes/seconds in the day, and when we choose one thing, it most likely means excluding something else. I mean, let's face it - multitasking can only get you so far. Part of the reason I chose to actively simplify my life was because I couldn't help but feel that I was so busy, I was missing my own life. Ever feel that way?

Now, I'm not talking about busy weeks or even months; there will be seasons of life where everything converges in a perfect storm of crazy. I'm talking about YEARS of frantic racing hither and yon, and being proud of it because a) we think we're SUPPOSED to be insane or b) we've mistaken it for a full and productive life. Or, perhaps we're run down and burned out, and wondering how the days flew by without our noticing it. And we have no idea which day could be our last, or the last of someone we love (morose, but true).

So, I choose not to be manic, crazed, insane, or frantic for the long haul. Today? Maybe. But not for the long haul. A juicy life doesn't have to be packed with enrichment and scheduled to the hilt to be truly nourishing. If my days are packed, I want them packed full of Life, which includes episodes of hectic rushing/cramming/scurrying, but also moments of beautiful stillness and quiet beauty. I don't want to miss smelling the baby smell of Sebastian's head, sharing coffee on the couch with my husband, or noticing the leaves starting to abandon ship on the tree outside. It seems to boil down to the preciousness of time, and whether we will spend it deliberately or not. Don't waste the miracle! Now go on, shoo - git. Go eat pie.

Day 41 - Fabulous Weekly Round Up!

With a poor sick beh-beh this week, not so much time for blogging. Or simplifying for that matter. But what was nice? That I had wiggle room to focus on a Feverish Sneezy Coughy Snot Monster and not have my world collapse in a tidal wave of chaos. Seems that some of that previous simplifying paid off! Hallelujah. The highlight? When I was carrying Sebastian on my back, and heard several (very, very moist) sneezes. Snot in my hair, down the back of my shirt, and, by the time I got him turned to the front, snot ALL OVER his head courtesy of both hands. If you had told me how little this would bother me pre-baby, I would have laughed and secretly thought your standards were too low. But now, I know... oh yes, I know.

So what did I do this week? I curtailed my crazed couponing, and assembled outfits so I can grab 'em and go. Oh yeah, I live a wild and crazy life. And what's super awesome? My hubby's home from tour for TEN WHOLE DAYS!!! You can't see me right now, but I'm doing an embarrassingly good chicken dance. OK, no more time for writing - my husband's home after all.

Day 40 - Is That What You're Wearing?

Since the Economic Downturn (cue depressing music), how often have we heard the perky ladies on the morning shows telling us to "shop our closets"? Well, today I did just that. I tossed my credit cards in my purse, grabbed a cart, and made a left at the bedroom door. I flung open my armoire and shopped til I dropped!

First, I changed out my spring/summer wardrobe for my fall/winter one - that in itself is like getting all new stuff. Then, since I have the fashion sense of an armadillo, I consulted www.instyle.com to give me a couple of pointers on how to pair a jacket and stilettos get dressed in the morning without looking like a very pulled-together bag lady. Well, for starters, I discovered that I'm doing it all wrong. This whole fashion thing? All wrong. This leaves me two options: 1) care 2) not care. I'm choosing option 1.5 - caring, but not too much.

The result? At least a month's worth of reasonably well-put-together outfits that won't make me look like I'm trying too hard. As I always say: if you're old enough to have worn a trend the first time around, you're probably too old to pull it off the second (in fact, here's a litmus test for you: if you're reading this blog, you probably shouldn't attempt that 80's trend). On the other hand, hell - who am I to tell you how to dress? If you want to parade around daily in a gold lame' disco dress with blinking lights on the (ahem) bodice, you go right ahead and fly that freaky flag. As for me? My days of fashion slavery are long over, and have been replaced by a "whimsical serviceability". I'm good with that.

Day 39 - Pinching Pennies Until They Scream

Attention shoppers! Ever wonder where all your hard-earned moolah winds up? ME TOO! Now, in general, I don't shop for fun. Don't get me wrong , I remember the thrill of coming home with bags of fabulous possibilities ("I will wear this chartreuse mini-dress EVERY DAY!"), but I'm trying to pare down, not stock up. Except.... except when it comes to groceries. When it comes to edibles, I morph into some sort of obsessive mutant coupon bounty hunter; I piggyback manufacturers coupons on top of store sales, buy in bulk, and rebate out the wazoo. I am Crazed Coupon Woman! So what's the problem?

 

The problem is that I'm trying to go all organic and healthy and most coupons are for highly processed foods or things we don't use. And while it KILLS me to pass up Raisin Bran at $.75 a box, I think we can do better. Besides, it takes a lot of time to clip endless coupons, check websites, comparison shop, and run to eight different stores, all the while making a list and checking it twice. Complicated. So here's what I'm a-gonna do.

 

1. Clip organic/healthy coupons only - that'll narrow it down.

2. Pick the grocery store with the cheapest prices & let the chips fall where they may, with trips to Trader Joe's whenever possible.

3. When I start to hyperventilate about the Raisin Bran special I'm missing out on, I can remind myself that even with the sale, ounce for ounce that canister of steel cut oats is way cheaper. Now mind you, I don't have to soak and boil my Raisin Bran, but one must make some sacrifices.

 

This will take some revisiting, but it's a good start. Besides, I know people (certainly not me - I would never do this) who have demolished an entire box of cereal in a day. I'm just sayin'...

 

Organic Deals and Coupons

 

Day 38 - I Hate Strollers

I do. I hate hate hate strollers. Now, I know that many mums love them, and in places other than NYC I can see them working out rather well. BUT. In the city, with the crowds and the subway and the dogs and the exhaust fumes and the lots and lots of crazy, well, you get my drift. Strollers are not just a pain, they're a liability! Allow me to explain.

A few days ago, we had to do a production meeting/site consult for a HUGE corporate event we're doing the aerial entertainment for. My dear assistant Sarah very kindly agreed to wrangle the little one for me while I was being buried alive in corporate this and that, so I brought him into the city in his stroller... which I have used once. Oh, the carnage! I must have clipped twelve people as we careened through the rush hour-packed streets on our way to the venue - it's a miracle anyone survived! Briefcases and papers were flying everywhere, people were diving for cover, and for those who weren't fast enough, well, I hope they have good insurance. Meanwhile, Sebastian was having the time of his life, reaching out to try to grab dangling purses, dog leashes, and a fist full of some poor woman's panty hose. It was awesome. And by awesome, of course I mean the most stressful way to get my baby from place to place EVER. My solution? Babywearing!

Fellow blogger and all around amazing mom Pamela Dayton wrote up the most awesome entry about babywearing - do check it out (and while you're at it, subscribe to her blog - you'll look forward to every post). Besides being an incredibly simple way of getting your baby from point A to point B, it allows you literally hundreds of those oh-so-sweet-and-all-too-fleeting moments of perfect baby enjoyment; you know the ones: snuggled sleeping under your chin, laughing hysterically at heaven-knows-what, sticking a tiny finger right up your nose or mashing banana in your ear (oh come on, you know you only pretend to hate it). So simple, so awesome.

I've wondered how long I should wear Sebastian, or how long I'll be able to schlep him around this way. My goal I've decided? Until he can walk like a New Yorker - briskly and with a purpose (which, given his current zooming state might not be too far in the distant future). Or until I'm crippled for life, whichever comes first. I just cannot handle the stroller drama, and maybe I won't have to. Much.

There are tons of ways to wear your behbeh (you can even make your own sling or carrier!), but my faves are:

The Moby Wrap (used until he was too heavy to carry in front)
The Beco (fantastic, distributes the weight in an ergonomically correct way)

If you have or are going to have a baby, it's definitely worth checking out!!!

Day 37 - No Really, You Shouldn't Have, Day 38 - Cheerio!

Day 37 - No Really, You Shouldn't Have

Woot! Happy birthday to me! I figured I'd take this opportunity to tackle the issue of presents, gifties, and "little somethings", and how they fit (or don't) into the simplified life. Those sainted souls who are close to me know better than to drop big bucks on presents, mainly because I'm one of those girls - the particular/hard to shop for kind.

Now, it seems to me that you could look at this one of several ways:
1. "Awesome! I'll ask her what she wants so she'll be sure to love it!" Score!
2. "Awesome! I'll get her a gift card and she can pick out what she wants!" Super!
3. "Awesome! I won't get her anything, I'll take her out for coffee." Perfect!
4. "Bummer. I never know what she wants, and I know for a fact she re-gifts all my presents. But I don't want to ask her what she wants because I enjoy throwing away my hard earned cash I want it to be a surprise." Hm. Not so good.
5. "I don't really care whether she likes my present or not - it's the thought that counts and she's lucky to get anything at all." Really not so good. Are you giving me a gift to punish me?

It's not that I'm ungrateful, truly! I'm always touched when people get me unsolicited gifts; I mean, who doesn't love being thought of? And some of you are AWESOME gift givers (example: my husband knew I wanted an iPod long before I did). But on the flip side, here's a question to ponder: when do presents become a burden to the recipient? For example, our apartment is "cozy", and everything in it is something we love, use, or that makes us money. If it doesn't fit into one of these categories, even if it's a fabulous or expensive item (hello, weird beaded purse with a kitty on it), we just can't keep it around - they'd have to send a TV crew over from "Hoarders" to find us, buried under a pile of stuff. So, when we get things that just aren't "us", the onus is on our family to pass it on in one way or another. And then the guilt, and the hassle...So, if you know someone who, like me, is actively trying to make room in their life for people and experiences rather than things, let me offer you some suggestions:

1. Cash or gift cards - unless you KNOW the person would be disappointed with $$ (in which case a visit to a therapist is in order - perhaps you could get them that?), this is an awesome gift. You can even find tons of creative ways to give it! If someone is passionate about a particular cause or charity, you can also make a donation in their name (just do make sure that it's truly important to them - I've seen this one go badly).

2. Just ask already! I know that I always have a mental list of several (thousand) items that I would love to have, but can't quite justify buying for myself. This is one of my favorite options - I get exactly what I want, I still love opening the package, and the person doing the gifting has the satisfaction of knowing they've gotten me something I truly wanted.

3. Time, company, or experience - instead of a thing, what about a good time (get your mind out of the gutter right now, pervert). Dinner out? A belly dancing lesson? (please... nobody get me that.) Underwater basket weaving session? An offer to babysit? Time hanging out with you? Perfect, I love it.

4. Memories - Another of my faves! Give a homemade scrapbook, photos, picture mug, love sonnet, or whatever. These are the things that never get purged, and that truly nourish the soul.

5. Useables - edible tidbits are always a go around here. The fancy chocolate, jam,  and cat poo coffee (thank you, Angela!) make great gifts because a) either you love it and will use it or b) you can pass it on pretty easily to someone who might enjoy it more. OR, as in the cat poo coffee, you can serve it at your next gathering and can let everyone in on the secret half-way through their cup (letting the cat out of the bag, so to speak). GOOD TIMES!

In closing, I would just encourage you to consider, really consider, the recipient of your next gift, and what you wish for that person. Sometimes, you just know you have a winner. But, when you're getting them something just to get them something? That's the time to take a leap of faith, and try a little something different. Or not.

Day 38 - Cheerio!

This is my final cleaning post (for now), and in a moment, I have an awesome anecdote to share with you. But first, I figured I'd tackle the issue of floors and how the heck to keep them clean-ish. First, I threw out my broom (gutsy, I know) and my floor steamer. Now, on Halloween, I'll have to ride around on my Swiffer! Awesome. I kept my "miracle mop" (a re-usable microfiber cloth on a stick) and my "Rubba-Sweepa" (a rubber nubby broom-y type thing with a squeegee on one side). That plus a vacuum cleaner is all I need to sweep, scrub, & suck up all the dirt... and other things. And you might want to consider having everyone take off their shoes on their way into the house - saves a LOT of sweeping time. OK, now for that anecdote:

A friend of my auntie and uncle had a baby. If this baby's pacifier (or anything else, for that matter) fell on the floor, it was promptly boiled and sanitized - wouldn't want baby to get any germs, right? Well, fast forward a few years, and POOF - twins arrive! Double trouble, double joy! When my aunt & uncle went to visit her, she opened the door and said, "Wait a second!". She turned and tossed a handful of Cheerios all over the floor and said, "That'll keep 'em busy for awhile!". Well, perhaps it loses something in the writing of it (you can't see my wild gesturing), but I love this story. So does Sebastian, who regularly snacks on petrified puffs or bits of yesterday's snack he found in his high chair. Mother of the Year right here, people!

Day 36 - Step Away from the Lysol

You could eat off my kitchen floor - trust me, Sebastian does it all the time. I suppose the real questions is: would you want to? To be honest, you'd probably keel over dead while I wouldn't necessarily serve a five course meal off it (the soup would get SO messy), I think you'd probably survive. However, if you've turned on the TV or opened a magazine in the past ten years, you might come away with the impression that you, your children, and your counter tops are teeming with viruses, bacteria, germs, Ebola, etc. Well, that's actually kind of true (except for the Ebola part - I really hope your counter tops are free of Level 5 hot agent viruses). But the real question is: how likely is it that these ickies will actually do you any harm? And might some of them be doing you some good? How clean is too clean?

Turns out, all that hyper-cleaning and sterilizing we've been doing has contributed mightily to antibiotic resistant bacteria, higher rates of childhood allergies, record numbers of autoimmune diseases, and wimpy immune systems. My friend Shannon once quipped that NYC children could probably "lick an anthrax popsicle" (I love this) and not get sick since they're exposed to all sorts of goodies on the subway, etc. When I was in India a few years ago, I watched the locals drinking water right out of the Ganges. Out of the Ganges, people. Can you imagine an immune system powerful enough to defeat what was in that water? I was totally impressed. Then I threw up for the next 24 hours.

Now, I'm not saying there's no place for the occasional use of hand sanitizers or disinfectant - you betta watch me use the Lysol the first time the ankle-biter brings home a poop-n-puke virus. If you live in a home with an immune-compromised person, or if someone is ill, it makes a great deal of sense to try to arrest the spread of germs. But for most of us, using triple-antibiotic ointment on every cut, squishing hand sanitizers between our fingers every few hours, and cleaning with products promising to kill 99.9% of germs are overkill. Basic hand washing with normal soap, house cleaning, and good hygiene will take care of a lot, but still give your immune system something to work on. So, for us it's bye bye heavy duty products, and hello to things like vinegar & lemon juice, and just plain old soap and water. It will be fine. Really. So, to the article in the parenting magazine that suggests that I wipe off my child's toys weekly in a bleach solution, I offer this: what's so wrong with a little dirt? And is it worse than my child mouthing a bleach solution? Get a grip. Eat dirt. It's good for you (and delicious when paired with a robust Merlot).
Now, lest you think I'm making all this up, here are some great articles. Check them out - then step awaaaay from the hand sanitizer.

Center for Disease Control

Grist

NY Times

Day 35 - Mmmmm.... Cleaning....

A few years ago, I got pertussis. As in whooping cough. Oh yes, I did - and it was absolutely horrific. I coughed non-stop for 18 days (and didn't sleep more than about 20 minutes at a time), and then had lingering asthma for the next three months. Now, by the end of it, I had abs of steel from all that hacking, but I had to switch to 100% natural cleaning products because the traditional stuff left me wheezing like a fat Schnauzer on a treadmill.

Now, why am I telling you this? If you have enough chemicals under your sink to make napalm, you might want to consider taking it down a notch to make it a little easier on your lungs, skin, etc. At the moment, I have a bunch of commercially made "natural" cleansers under my sink, all of which cost a bazillion dollars because all eco-minded people are loaded, right? Ahem. Right. Of course. In any case, how cheap and natural can a city mouse go without sacrificing that squeaky clean I crave? (get it? mouse? squeaky?) Turns out, I have everything I need in my pantry. Just call me Donna Reed.

Basics: acid (to cut grease), scouring agent (to, um, scour), micro-fiber cloths (to wipe up the mess when you're done)

Vinegar works beautifully (one part vinegar to one part water) as an all-purpose cleanser. You don't want to use it on marble, and you must dilute it properly or it can eat away at grout. You can even use this stuff as fabric softener, with the added bonus that it makes your detergent work better. My only issue? THE SMELL. Phew. So, I use it only where I really need to cut grease. Or when I'm making salad dressing. Hey, how's THAT for multitasking?

Lemon juice: also cuts grease. You can mix it with olive oil to polish your hard woods, shine your pots & pans, and mix it with a bit of vinegar and baking soda to make a cleaning paste. Removes hard water stains and build up from faucets too.

Baking soda - natural deodorizer (we need a lot of that around here), and absolutely fantastic when you need a little grit to get the job done. Used with a couple of cups of boiling water every two weeks or so, you've also got nature's Drano! Nifty.

My current favorite all-purpose cleaning recipe? 1/2 cup of water, one tsp of lemon juice (from a bottle is just fine), half a tsp of Baby Mild Dr Bronner's Soap.

Olive oil (or any kind of oil, for that matter) shines up stainless steel appliances right purty.

Micro-fiber cloths: amazing. You can clean most things with just a bit of water and one of these cloths. They clean without streaking, suck up dust, polish, babysit the children, take the dog for a walk, and then you just pop them in the washing machine when you're done! (the cloths, not the children or dog...)

And that's it, people! Once I've used up my stash of fancy eco-cleaners, it's scrubbing with marinade from there on out. Here are some good sites to get you started, and tomorrow, we're going to look at why blasting bacteria with assorted sanitizers may not be such a great idea. Now get to work, Cinderella!

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