Day 13 - I Hate Flying

You too? Sit down, let’s chat. Today, I am blogging to you from friendly Erie, PA, home of Long’s School of Dance (http://www.longschoolofdance.com/ ). Each year, these fine folks fly me out as a guest choreographer to teach some aerial silk workshops and help them put together the aerial component of their upcoming season. So how did I get here? I flew through a hurricane, people.

When I left the house, the fuzzy halo of frizz around my head predicted a humid day in NYC. As I hoofed it to the subway, I quickly realized that my chosen ensemble had a fatal flaw: rogue glitter. I was wearing a bright yellow Indian-inspired tee shirt (that I’m at least 5 10 years too old for) with glitter on it, and the sparkles EXPLODED as I walked. By the time I stepped onto the train, my luggage and I had reached drag queen status – it was both awesome and terrifying… and twinkly.

I checked in with no drama, and lined up for stupidity insanity security. These folks had apparently never seen a breast pump because they questioned me about it until I pantomimed what it was for (heh heh – that shut ‘em up!). Hilarity ensued. After a quick stop at Starbucks (gift card!), I wheeled up to my gate to find a delay. SHOCKING! Four lattes, two magazines, and a soggy turkey sandwich later, I plopped myself down on the plane next to a woman with a blue plastic flower sprouting from her head. Ummmm…. bold fashion choice (says the human disco ball).


I will spare you the gory details of my flights, but this leads me to today’s topic: simple travel. Remember the days when you just put your bag on the conveyor belt, walked through the metal detector, and got on the plane? Those days are gooooooooone, people. Air travel now requires all the preparation previously reserved for spinal cord micro-surgery. It begs the question: what does one really need to travel comfortably?

Enter: the simplified packing list! Turns out, you can travel with a lot less than you’d think. I’ll include the carry on list here; zap me an email if you’d like a copy of the complete list, with or without child in tow. Let’s just say I cut the size of my bag down to 1/3 of what I usually tote. And you know what? I didn’t miss a single thing. Happy packing!

The Fully Fabulous Carry-On
- pared down wallet (ID, cash, one credit card, ATM card, insurance card)
- tech bag (ziplock or zippered see-thru pouch) – cell phone, iPod
- lap top
- ONE book, ONE magazine
- empty stainless steel water bottle
- small tin of balm for lips and other dry bits (Smith’s Rosebud Salve is a good one)

Done. Now, where’s the nice flight attendant with that drink cart?